Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Letting Go

Here's something I've been thinking about for awhile, for all you fellow control freaks out there.

Is there something in your life that you've been frustrating yourself about, beating your head against the proverbial brick wall, futilely trying to "fix"? Is it something that you actually can make happen through perseverance, effort, and skill, or are you pitting yourself against something that you can't actually do anything about?

Have you been frequently unnecessarily angry, annoyed, and frustrated with yourself and those around you without a readily apparent reason? Do you know why? Is there something specific eating you, such as bad news or a difficult task, or are you stressed about the fact that you aren't in complete control of your life and you can't make everything perfect?

Yes, I'm describing myself. Here's a line I wrote in a conversation with my mom: sometimes we should give up on things that are not going to work.

Example: due in part to a childhood obsession with the book Melisande, by E. Nesbit, I've always wanted to have really long hair. I mean really long hair; waist length, for sure, if I could have more I might want more. For years I've been in the process of attempting to grow thick, healthily-looking waist-length hair. It's not going to happen for me, though; everybody's hair has a certain point past which it will not grow and still be full and healthy, and mine is only a little below my shoulders. Boo hoo! So, I finally gave up and cut it above my shoulders, declaring that, okay, I was never going to have lovely waist-length hair, and therefore I needed to figure out something that I could do that I would like. Now, I think that was one of the best decisions I've ever made; it looks nice, it's ridiculously more convenient, and I'm finally content with the hair that I have!

Now, if only I would start applying that in other areas of my life . . .